Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Patience is a . . . gene?

I'm in the mood to rant and rave about idiocy, and not in the mood to be forgiving. So if you're the type of person that responds, "Yeah, that sucks. But you should still be nice to them because they're people too," then . . .

this is not your moment.


Typically, I try to be a pretty a nice gal. But I'm a hard-core visual learner, and when I'm actually in the situation of interacting with a person who learns differently (say, an auditory learner), it is a challenge for me to remember the other person is of course not stupid--they are just processing their environment differently from myself.

Case in point: when I used to give horseback riding lessons. I am in no way, shape, or form an athletic person. But I can mimic what I see. So if a trainer was working with me, and demonstrates something by looking like a moron and pretending to ride a horse, or if they describe it verbally in such a way that I could see what they're talking about, then I can probably do it.  With varying amounts of grace, but obvious comprehension nonetheless.

What boggles my mind are the folks out there who have to go through every wrong thing first.  No matter how well I demonstrate, no matter how beautifully I describe it, they won't get it until they've yanked the reins this way, that way, and the other way. They hear me say they need to pull the reins in the direction of yon, but still--STILL!!--have to try go hither and tither first. Watching the process makes my head spin around my shoulders, slowly expanding until it explodes against the arena wall.

In my defense, Gazelle has trouble being open-minded with these kinds of learners too. My lack of tolerance, or maybe just lack of patience, is a personality flaw of mine that I have to work on to be a better person.

But there is one thing that I absolutely can not, will not, understand or tolerate.  It is wholly different than auditory versus visual versus verbal learning:


I have examples up the wazoo.  If I were to list them all the sheer volume would lull you into a state of ennui from which you'd never recover.  But the point is:  I don't have to be defensive or accepting about helplessness, do I?

At various jobs in my history I've always ended up in the indescribable position of Sherlock Holmes meets Larry the Cable Guy.  I enjoy solving puzzles, following clues, and generally gittin'-r-done.

Sometimes it backfires, though.

Helpless people love git-r-done'ers. Their helplessness is like a disease. The bacterial infestation of helplessness senses the presence of a git r done'er, and starts breeding and multiplying and consuming at the cellular level.  Common sense is out, incompetency and uselessness are IN:

A light bulb is out. (Tell the maintenance man!)  Who?
The copier is jammed. (Follow the instructions on the display of the copier!)  The display?
The toilet it clogged. (Go get a plunger!)  A plunger? (It's behind the toilet)  I didn't see it.
My computer is broken. (What's the problem?) It won't plunge the toilet for me.
We're out of paper. (There's a box in the supply room) Where's the supply room?
Where's so-and-so? I don't know. Are they in a meeting? I still don't know. Is s/he in the supply room? Silence.  The bathroom?  More silence but this time coupled with an incredulous look that always gets me in trouble for bitchiness.  So, what you're saying is that you don't know?  I don't know.

Ka-BOOM!  Splatter.


izzy said...

I can get aggravated by people who seem to do the opposite of what you tell them too. I took reins and stirrups away from one girl and put her back on a lunge line!

Lindsay said...

This is fantastic, I completely agree with you! I can't stand helpless people, and above that, helpless women. What, are we not supposed to be able to change light bulbs too?? Is it really that difficult?!

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